I.Martin Imports. July 31, 2011

In the summer of 1974, before going to college,  I went to Europe with 2 friends for a 6 week adventure.  We explored the continent from Tito’s Yugoslavia,  through Italy, Switzerland, France and all the way north to the Arctic Circle in Norway.  Before the trip was finished, I often considered what an even greater experience it could be by bicycle.

The next year, 1975, home for spring break, my good friend from high school, already an avid cyclist, took me to I.Martin Imports to buy my first real road-bike; a chrome Lygie, with Campy Corsa components and sew-up tires. $380.00

I didn’t know the difference between Campy or Sachs, sew-ups, tubulars or clinchers.  100% neophyte with a mission in mind.

In 1977, I landed in Paris on Easter Sunday, on my own,  to begin the trip and returned home on August 7th.

That trip became the loom of the fabric of my life.

I.Martin Imports, located on Beverly & N. Flores, just east of La Cienega , in Los Angeles,  has become one of the shops owned by Helen’s Cyclery.

Ohhhh yea! The season has hit the burnout threshold, and in perfect form, the speed workout [double pace-line] at the park [this morning] was  evidence of everyone’s enthusiasm.

All the wankers are riding with the expectation that the wheel in front will take up the slack.

The UberFreddie is on the gas and the Tortuga is playing his usual antics:  as I’m coming off the pull,  with the insane Tortuga on my wheel, he comes around and gases the throttle.  I’m thinking, “Forget about it.”   I’m resolved to get the “F” off his wheel once I’m at the back.  It was the same damn thing with the UberFred coming on the pull.  I just had to get away from those  two maniacs.

And everyone is thinking the same thing {“F” those idioits} except they’re letting those idiots get away.  I close the gap once and the insane duo launch themselves again.  Tortuga’s playing the same game over and over; “I’ll just soft pedal back – wreck some havoc on the pace-line.”    Coming along the fire-station stretch, I shout to Hegg, “Come on SuperFreddie, don’t let me down – take me up to those F&^$#ers.”  I close the gap [again] and Tortuga sits up, laughing,  and rides me to the back.

Oh yea! [I'm thinking...] That’s it for you prick!

Try to have an honorable training ride and everyone’s gotta be a comedian.

I thought the Tortuga was my home boy but apparently it’s more about the entertainment than anything.  Ok, well, now that I know the sytch, we can all move ahead.

Bunch of wankers this morning on the El Dorado Circle Jerk.

45minutes!  On the Gas. Pure comedy.

Pan Dulce and coffee ! ! !

Now that’s the way to start a bike ride and celebrate the MexicanSongBird’s cuplianos.

6:30am | Coffee Bean | Seal Beach on Main St. & PCH for delicious Mexican Sweet Bread & Coffee before the usual Saturday ride.

Pan Dulces will be provided.  Buy coffee as you like it from the establishment.

Todos Bienvenidos ! !
RVSP [por favor].

This will be the first of the Pan Dulce Rides.
It’s going to be a Bi-Monthly event:  every other month.

Feed the Fat.
Be Animaux.
Luci ! !  eyt’z broh’can!

Interview with Jens Voigt*

MSB: Jens [can I call you Jens?] What’s your general philosophy regarding shaving?

JV: Yah, shav’in is gudt. It’s gudt for the legs and it’s even gudt to keep the armpits shaved and clean.

MSB: Oh really? What’s the advantage of shaving your armpits?

JV: Oh sure. It gives Jens Voigt the psychological edge.  There are no secrets in the peloton. The armpit hair is associated with a man’s manliness. When the peloton knows Jens Voigt shaves the armpits, they know he has no boundaries and it instills yet even deeper fear into their hearts and helps them accept their destiny.  For example, when there is a break up the road and you think to yourself  “Oh, sure,  it will take a long time to work my way up there to kill all of them,” you have a keen satisfaction knowing they will feel even more humiliated realizing a man with shaved armpits has destroyed them. Yah, they accept it because they know they cannot conquer a man who has no concern about his superficial appearance of  manliness, but only about being a man who conquers.

Voigt and his wife Stephanie have six children, the youngest born January 2011.  Mr. Voigt will be 40 on September 17 (born Sept 17, 1971).

Jens Voigt Quips and Quotes: http://www.azraceresults.com (quote: “Oh man, it’s going to take days to kill all these people!”)

Since we’ve determined that cyclists shaving [legs] is mostly vanity, let’s consider the practicality of a simpler shaving task;  the ArmPit.  Body builders save their armpits; all that hair is simply too distracting.  Armpit hair is something like nose hair; it demands to be trimmed [removed].  In our hyper-hygienic world, we sanitize, manitize, pedicate, wax, coif, scrub, bleach, electrolysize, laserize, liposuck, deodorize, moisturize, defoliate and pluck.  When ya’got armpit hair, that’s where the deodorant goes; all over the hair.  The idea of applying deodorant directly over armpit hair just never made sense to me.  Applying deodorant directly to a cleanly shaved armpit, now that makes sense.  Armpit hair with all that white powder, gel crusted,  nonsense is just absurd.

Don’t wait.  Stop deodorizing your armpit hair and get closer to the source of the scent.

Save your legs -  Shave your armpits.  Be Animaux.

“Il Campionissimo” Fausto Coppi (1952)

Why cyclists shave their legs is an old & tired story.  Everyone understands the pragmatic explanation;  facilitate massage and ease the care of road rash.

It’s a tradition that is deep and glorious and we love to be a thread in the fiber of the peloton’s spirit.  And,  of course,  the vanity is obvious.  I’ve shaved my legs for more years now than not.   There’s a heightened sense of hygiene and health in shaved legs;  smooth and clean.

And let me add; it’s regardless of age.  In August, 1982, in the city of Lyon, France, after circling a round-about too many times, I found myself face-to-face with an older , deeply tanned cyclist [he seemed to be in his late 70s] who suddenly appeared and began to offer directions [all in French] to a fellow cyclist who, he assumed, was apparently lost.  He rolled up, around and between cars as if none were there,  stout, muscular and robust, with loose fitting shorts, a snug t-shirt and legs like canons, tan and shaved.  The image is permanently fixed in my mind.  I always refer to him as the “Greeter of Lyon.”   I’ll never forget his character and the shaved hearty legs of that septuagenarian.

Levi Strauss has introduced a pair of pants for cyclists.  This speaks volumes about the cycling movement.  Visit the Levi’s website.  Watch out Outlier! [Visit Outlier's website too.]

Andrea White-Kjoss (CEO Bikestation) with the Wolfpack Hustle Boys

The Wolfpack A Boys basking in the glory of their victory at the finish in Long Beach near the Aquarium.

Story summarized below [blah-blog] or for the full story visit:

• LATimes.com
• Slate (online magazine) by Tom Vanderbilt